Take drastic measures by tearing down walls of protection & becoming vulnerable in service, flexibility, courage & forgiveness. A commitment to charity & God's love for marital problems.

Bible Studies for Women

In Times Like This

I've heard that after the wedding bells stop ringing, marriage partners begin to reduce each other to fit their own molds. Ah, but that could never happen to us! Or so I said before we got married.

But now I'm beginning to feel uncomfortably reduced! I thought we knew each other well, but sometimes now I feel I hardly know you at all.

It seems you're trying to squeeze me into your mold, yet at the same time you've smashed all the boundaries which held my cast of an ideal mate.

In times like these, my love can no longer afford to be merely an emotion. In times like these, my love must mature into a ministry, because...

Love is selfish when it swoons, "I love you because of who I am when I am with you." Love is agape when it declares, "I will serve you regardless of who I am when I am with you."

There will be times when you will sin against me. During these times I promise to follow the example of our Lord in his relationship with Judas Iscariot. Jesus demonstrated the same love toward Judas that he lavished upon the other apostles. During their three years of companionship, Jesus' treatment of Judas never gave away the fact that Jesus knew Judas was an imposter (John 13:1-34.)

Forgiveness is not passive.
Forgiveness aggressively makes itself vulnerable.
Forgiveness is turning the other cheek. 70 x 70.

There will be times when we are angry with each other. When I am angry, I promise to abide by this counsel:

"Be angry without doing wrong; let not the sun go down on your wrath;

And do not give way to the Evil One.

Let him who was a thief be so no longer, but let him do good work with his hands, so that he may have something to give to him who is in need.

Let no evil talk come out of your mouth, but only what is good for giving necessary teaching, and for grace to those who give ear.

And do not give grief to the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were marked for the day of salvation.

Let all bitter, sharp and angry feeling, and noise, and evil words, be put away from you, with all unkind acts;

And be kind to one another, full of pity, having forgiveness for one another, even as God in Christ had forgiveness for you."

There will be times when I will sin against you. During these times, I promise to say the three hardest words in the English language:

Some of our friends are getting divorced. Others are living together in "emotional divorce." But our marriage will be different, because...

1. I will honor our wedding vows before God. I promise to abide with you in love until death do us part.

2. I will let nothing you do destroy me, for I will trust in the Lord at all times.

"Trust in him at all times, you people. Pour out your heart before him. God is a refuge for us"

"We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose...to be conformed to the image of his Son..."

3. No matter what you do, I will not protect myself by building a wall between us; for how can I love you through a wall?

4. No, I will not do those things. You see, my love for you is aggressive enough to serve, if need be. It is flexible enough to adjust, if need be. It is brave enough to hurt, if need be. Whatever you do, my love will forgive, because God's love has been born in me.

Many marriages have failed, but ours will not fail; because I will saturate our marriage with God's love -- agape love -- and...

"Agape never fails."